Friday, February 3, 2012

Gut feeling, or God calling?

Ok, I have to admit something. I don't have a cup of coffee next to me, not yet anyway...I have a feeling I won't finish this entry in one sitting, so I promise to have a cup next to me at some point. Pheww, glad I got that off my chest.

On to the good stuff..

The other day I got the opportunity to travel to Mizzou for the weekend, and I almost took it. I got off work, I rearranged my schedule for classes so I could go, the only thing between me and visiting friends at Mizzou was a couple days. So the other night, I was at work-where I do my best thinking-and I was thinking about this trip to Mizzou...something didn't feel right. Other than the fact that I vowed never to step foot on Mizzou's campus, being a KU fan and all, I just didn't have a good feeling about it. I reached out to a couple friends, wondering if they thought I was crazy for feeling it and the more I talked with them, the more this gut feeling felt like God's voice, telling me to stay in Fayetteville. I didn't know why, and honestly, I still don't, but I knew that He was telling me to stay back.

It's funny because there have been times where I felt like I was pouring out my soul to God, begging for Him to speak to me, to send me some sort of message confirming what I was doing was right. But it was just so strange that when it all seemed to fit, I had a place to stay, a ride there and home, friends to see, God was telling me, "don't do it." I know I would have fun this weekend if I were to go, but the more I thought about it, the more I want to listen to what He had to tell me. The next day, I come to find that Margaret, my good friend here who was going to go to Mizzou as well, had that same gut feeling. I don't know if she thought it was God, because to be honest, I don't know if she believes in Him the same way I do, but it was just the confirmation that I was doing the right thing.

I think it's a great lesson that God is in complete control of my life. He knows what is best for me, even when I don't see why what I could be doing is wrong. Like I said, I know I would have fun if I had gone this weekend, but He has something else in mind. I have to take the opportunity to listen to Him in simple situations like this, where it is obvious that He is saying something, so when it isn't so obvious, I can have faith He is there.

(Well, the weekend went by and I didn't get to finish this post. Now that I have coffee in hand I can tell you that it was a great weekend for me to stay in Fayetteville! Not only did KU lose to Mizzou...good thing I wasn't on Mizzou's campus for that one...but I had an incredible weekend bonding with people here. I got a lot closer to my good friends here, and celebrated with my sister being finished with the hardest test of her life! I also played ultimate frisbee on one of the colder days we've had this winter and really learned a lot about how to be a better player!)

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